Thought I Was Fearless
by ZevieObsessed2012
Summary: We all like to think of ourselves as Fearless... and maybe sometimes we are. But there's one thing that scares even me. Love. -Stevie Baskara ONE-SHOT: ZEVIE! ALTERNATE ENDING UP NOW! Thanks for the reviews!
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: OH MY GOSH! Lulu Antariksa replied to me on Twitter! Fangirling right now. Lol. That's nothing new-I'm always fangirling. This is pretty good since I have the actual social life of a rock haha. This is ENTIRELY in Stevie's POV.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own How to Rock**

I thought I was fearless. I really did. I always thought I'd never have to be really afraid... until I met Zander. No, I wasn't _afraid_ of him... I was afraid to be in love with him. I always thought I'd never have to worry about that kind of stuff... but suddenly he's all I think about. And maybe it's a phase... but what if it isn't? I'm afraid to be with him because he's a flirt. Every chance he gets.

_I thought I was fearless. _

I really did. But now I'm not so sure. I'm in love with my best friend. We share glances... we tease each other, and heck, we do touch each other a lot. We don't realize it. But, apparently everyone else does. I wish I was fearless. But everyday I see Zander, I'm so afraid I'm going to screw everything up and blurt something stupid. Like everyone, I seem to find the _"perfect_" time to put my foot in my mouth.

Right now I'm in the band room. I wrote him song. And I feel so scared to share it. It's horrible, the feeling. I thought I was fearless. As I play the chords, the words stick in my head. And I begin singing:

_Wish you loved me_

_Like I love you baby_

_As the days, they go on_

_I find it harder to be me_

_I hide my feelings _

_Inside of me because_

_I know_

_That I'm the only one who's feeling this_

_And I'm the only one who's suffering inside_

_That I'm the only one in love_

"What's that?" someone asks. I jump, slamming random keys. The sounds vibrates around the room a moment, and I realize it isn't Zander. I sigh in relief and say, "It's nothing. Just a song I wrote," I say. "Well, it's great," Kacey says, sitting down next to me on the piano stool. "Were you going to present that when the band gets here?" she asks. I shake my head. "Why not?" Kacey asks. "Because... I can't?" I lie. "Of course you can!" she says. I look at her with the truth pouring out of my eyes. "Oh... you can't..." she says, finally understanding. I nod my head.

"But he doesn't have to know it's about him, Stevie," Kacey says. "But he will. I can't sing that song in front of him! I'd screw it all up, and he'll know," I say. "Why are you so worried about it anyway? Why can't you ask him out?" Kacey asks. "Because, Kace. He flirts with every girl he can! And... I don't want to ruin our friendship," I say. "That is such an overused excuse," Kacey says. "Well, it's true," I retort. Kacey rolls her dark eyes and says, "Stevie... You're talented, beautiful, strong, and great person. Zan's missing out, and if he can't see you... you have to make him," she says. "But how?" I ask.

"What if I let you sit on this bench and sing that song when the boys get here? I mean, when he hears _you_... he'll have to fall for you," Kacey says. I hesitate, but Kacey makes me promise I won't chicken out. "Get ready, Stevie! I think I hear them coming," Kacey says. She's right. We only leave the band room door open if we aren't practicing. Otherwise, it's always open, but the band room-when closed-is pretty well sound-proof.

The boys enter the band room. "Who's ready to present their music?" Kacey asks, looking at me. "I-I'll go first," I say. Kacey smiles. We give ourselves homework. Usually two people from the group have to go home and write a song to present as the new song for the band. I get myself ready at the piano and begin playing my song again.

_Wish you loved me_

_Like I love you baby_

_As the days, they go on_

_I find it harder to be me_

_I hide my feelings _

_Inside of me because_

_I know_

_That I'm the only one who's feeling this_

_And I'm the only one who's suffering inside_

_That I'm the only one in love_

I'm blushing now. I've never written a song like this... or gone this deep with myself. Everyone's jaw-except Kacey's-is open. "That's an amaazing song," Kevin says, hypnotized. Nelson says, "You have a pretty voice," hypnotized too. Zander though... he doesn't say anything. "What did you think, Zander?" Kacey asks. I push a stray piece of hair behind my ear nervously. "I think it's a great song! How'd you come up with it?" he says after a moment. "I guess it just... came to me," I say. "That's too deep to have just come from you," Kacey says. I send daggers with my eyes at her.

"Yeah... seriously, Stevie. How'd you come up with it?" Nelson asks. I feel trapped in all of a sudden. I knew this was bad idea. Kacey just sucked me in... I thought I was fearless. I really did. But now... I feel so stuck. "If she doesn't want to tell you... just forget about it," Zander speaks up. I feel suddenly full of relief. I don't think I could live if I had to admit this... _affection_ out loud.

Kacey, Nelson and Kevin shrug their shoulders, and then move on. It's Kacey's day to present too. She presents a song, much faster than mine, and she sings it a capella. Then again, she really doesn't play an instrument... except her throat.

When band practice is over, and all our instruments are put where they belong, Kacey and I are the last to leave. "You chickened out..." she says. "Well, you basically threw me under the bus. What did you think I'd do? Come clean like it was nothing?" Kacey doesn't answer. I guess she really did think that. "It doesn't matter anyway. I'm just going to let it play out," I say. "You'll regret it later on..." Kacey says in a sing-song voice that means she's definitely right. "I know..." I chime back, sarcastically. She leaves before me and I grab my bag and leave the band room.

I thought I was fearless. But no one is.

**A/N: You hate me for ending this ONE-SHOT there huh? Lol anyway, if you guys want... I could post my alternate ending! :D Yes, I had a much different idea for the ending of this. Well, actually I took off a whole chunk. So, if you guys REALLY REALLY REALLY want this ending, just let me know! :D **


	2. Alternate Ending

**A/N: Ah! See, I knew you all wanted the original ending! :D Haha! **_**Italics **_**is where the original ending is! :D **

When band practice is over, and all our instruments are put where they belong, Kacey and I are the last to leave. "You chickened out..." she says. "Well, you basically threw me under the bus. What did you think I'd do? Come clean like it was nothing?" Kacey doesn't answer. I guess she really did think that. "It doesn't matter anyway. I'm just going to let it play out," I say. "You'll regret it later on..." Kacey says in a sing-song voice that means she's definitely right. "I know..." I chime back, sarcastically. She leaves before me and I grab my bag and leave the band room.

I thought I was fearless. But no one is.

As I leave the band room, I nearly bump into someone. All I see is their feet. That pair of black, shiny ankle-boots is too easily recognizable. I swallow the urge to gulp and look into the chocolate brown eyes I know to be Zander's. "Oh, hi, Zander," I say. _Way to go, Stevie. That's what you were supposed to say_! My mind yells sarcastically. "Hey, Stevie. I was just coming back. I forgot my picks," he says. I nod my head. "Hey, that song you presented was really good. I know you didn't want to say it before... but who did you write it for?" he asks.

To sway him of the topic, I go back into the band room pretending to not have heard him and pick up his pick case. I hand it to him and say, "You're writing a song for tomorrow?" He seems amused and says, "I know you're avoiding me, Stevie. Who's it for? Come on, I won't laugh..." he assures. _No. You won't. You're right. You'll probably run away_. My mind screams. "Is it for Justin?" he asks. I shake my head. My palms grow sweaty and I try think of a good lie. "Please?" he begs, giving me his best puppy-dog eyes.

_Oh kill me now_. I whine mentally. I swallow the lump in my throat-man this is annoying, these feelings! I look at the floor, studying his shoes. "Stevie?" he says, waving his hand in front of my face. I swallow again and whisper, "_you_." He doesn't reply.

I look up, and before I can register his expression... or anything else, he's kissing me. It's a slow, sweet kiss... and it makes me dizzy. When he pulls away, I can't move. He kissed me. What does that mean? "You like me too?" I ask. He nods his head. "Since I first met you," he says. "Same here..." I say. I'm still sweating, and all I can think is _Thank Lord for deodorant_. I thought I was fearless... but no one is.

But Zander, now that he knows-and feels the same-makes me _feel_ fearless. Like I'm walking on air, no strings attached or magic clouds under my feet... whatever those fairytales would use. It's just this feeling in me.

I can't believe I freaked out so much over that. I thought I was fearless!

**A/N: How'd you like this ending? Is this one (the original) better than the ending you read first? Let me know which one you liked most! :D**


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